


when you're ready, come & get it

by a_miiraculer, clairelutra (exosolarmoon)



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Humor, Unresolved Sexual Tension, dorks being dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-11 21:21:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16860511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_miiraculer/pseuds/a_miiraculer, https://archiveofourown.org/users/exosolarmoon/pseuds/clairelutra
Summary: Chat and Ladybug collaborate on the story of how they started dating.(astart a fireouttake.)





	when you're ready, come & get it

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [start a fire](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13371918) by [a_miiraculer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_miiraculer/pseuds/a_miiraculer), [clairelutra (exosolarmoon)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/exosolarmoon/pseuds/clairelutra). 



> a ko-fi drabble for @parlezvousladybug on tumblr \o/
> 
> i have a lot of mixed feelings about this one, but it's got its moments imo

“So, what’s our story?”

On the other end of the line, Chat let out what sounded like a held breath. “No akuma?”

It was a clear, moonlit night—not an akuma in sight. Ladybug was hopping over dusty-turned-muddy rooftops and dodging the puddles in peace. Pretty normal for a solo patrol. “Nope, no akuma.”

To be fair, perhaps she should have started the call with a few more pleasantries than that. She didn’t call Chat just to chat much.

“Our story for what?”

“This… dating thing,” Ladybug said into her communicator as she revved up for a particularly big jump. _“Hup!_ I mean, they’re gonna ask us how we got together, you know?”

“Oh! Well, that’s easy—”

“It is?” Ladybug wondered, dubious and amused.

“—it was after a _big_ battle—”

“Oh, it was _big_ , was it,” she put in, unable to resist.

 _“Very_ big,” Chat reassured her, and she could actually _hear_ the salacious wink in his voice.

“Oh my _god._ ”

(She was laughing though, because of course she was.)

“— _anyway,_ it was a very big battle, we realized we just _could not_ live without each other, and then we kissed.”

Ladybug stumbled to a halt over the next roof, petrichor rushing into her nose as she struggled for balance.

“…‘Kissed’,” she repeated, toneless in her attempts to not laugh aloud. She’d really expected a bed to be involved there somehow.

“After the 'mission accomplished!’ bit,” Chat confirmed, apparently oblivious to the source of her amusement. “Very romantic, don’t you think?”

 _That_ part, at least, was pert and mischevious.

“Very,” she said, her voice too deep to reach the proper level of dryness. She coughed to get it under control, but a few breathless snickers escaped her anyway. “More seriously—”

“—I was _totally_ serious—”

 _“—More seriously,”_ Ladybug repeated louder, hopping from the roof over one of her parents’ rival bakeries to the roof over the post office, “how long have we been interested in one another?”

“Since we met,” Chat replied easily. “It was love at first sight, of course.”

With crystal clarity, Ladybug remembered the gentle pressure of Chat’s hands, the warmth in his eyes and the reassurance in his smile as he pointed out to her that Chloé would be dead if not for her, that he believed in her, that they could do this—

She firmly pushed back the odd little twisting sensation in her chest. “I said _more_ seriously, Chat.”

“Alright, _I’ve_ been in love with you since we met,” Chat groused, his voice catching a little over the words—no doubt making a jump or two of his own.

“They’ll never believe that,” Ladybug pointed out, rolling her eyes. _Who_ here was the hopeless flirt?

(In all fairness, it might have been her, but if it was, she sure as hell wasn’t alone.)

Chat paused for a long moment, and Ladybug took the opportunity to pick her way across a particularly tricky gap.

She’d just touched down on solid ground again when Chat added, “Secretly in love with you. _Very_ secretly.”

…Somehow, she’d forgotten that Chat was a hopeless romantic as well as a hopeless flirt.

“Sure thing, tiger,” she said, dry and saccharine as cake mix as she alighted on a street lamp and took stock of the intersection ahead of her. “And all that fangirl baiting is just your way of dealing with your unrequited feelings for me? You’re flirting with all the receptionists to make me jealous and then going to dinner with them when you fail?”

It occurred to her as she spoke that that… wasn’t actually that hard to believe. She might’ve bought it herself if she hadn’t known better.

“It was _one time_ ,” was Chat’s choice of exasperated protest. “Her boyfriend dumped her and she couldn’t pay the restaurant reservation on her own. We talked about _physics._ ”

“It was three times, actually.” She’d know—all the blacklisting in the world couldn’t keep it off her socials, she’d _tried._ “It… _might_ work, I guess.”

Chat huffed. Magical communicators didn’t do the rush of static noise thing that real phones did, so it almost sounded like he was right beside her. “'Course it’ll work. What about you?”

“What _about_ me?” Even as she said it, she knew what _about_ her, but the banter was just autopilot at this point.

“When did you realize _this cat_ has everything you need?”

Ladybug swore she heard an audible wink in there somewhere.

She looked to the sky as if to plead for patience, even if he couldn’t see her. “Try 'in your dreams.’”

“Meowch.”

Ladybug rubbed the bridge of her nose and forced herself to think about it seriously. “I think… a few months ago might work.”

“A few months ago?” Chat echoed, blank.

“You smiled different and everything exploded into rainbows and sunshine, or something.” The hopeless romantic here _definitely_ wasn’t her. “Then… uh…”

“'Smiled different’?” he questioned, a layer to his voice that she categorized as 'dubious.’ “Like… how?”

She puffed her cheeks, embarrassed. “I dunno. Don’t you ever get crushes like that?”

“Not really.”

“Oh,” said Ladybug, now feeling very awkward indeed. “Uh, well. It happens to me, so that’s what we’re going with.”

Chat blew out a little breath. “Okay.”

“So yes!” Ladybug chirped, wishing that jumping out of a window could fix her predicament. “Crush. I got a crush on you, and then… huh.”

Chat didn’t seem to have anything to add to that, which meant that Ladybug was left to flail in her awkwardness alone. “Um. What was the last akuma that erased people’s memories? Was it The Dealer? Nutcracker?”

“Nutcracker. When the fantasy world dissolved, remember?”

“Right. So. Say… you sacrificed your life for me— _again_ , seriously, _stop doing that_ —and I decided that I just couldn’t live without you or something, and we kissed before the clock tower fell.”

“…Sounds good to me,” Chat agreed.

“Right,” said Ladybug. _God_ it was weird planning something like this. It felt like something essential was missing—probably the 'and then you use Cataclysm on the focus’ part. “So! I guess we’re dating now.”

“Guess so.”

“I bet you’re so happy you’re skipping.”

“Ha, skipping? I’m not an _amateur,_ Ladybug. I’m _leaping._ ”

Ladybug’s snort caught gracelessly in the back of her throat. “Make it a triple lutz.”

“What, seriously?” There was a clank, a scrape of metal like Chat had tossed his staff down. “I don’t even have an ice rink.”

“Has that ever stopped you?”

Chat inhaled sharply, then paused. Ladybug could almost see him pressing a finger against his lips as he thought. “…Well.”

“Go for a double at least,” Ladybug urged, grinning. She was coming upon the place where their patrols brushed routes, so maybe… “And show me!”

“Well, _if_ the lady insists.”

When Chat set up his staff to show her the flat roof he had claimed, Ladybug found that she was right; the street corner he was at was pretty close.

“Watch carefully!” he said, shining a sunny, handsome smile through the screen.

Ladybug snorted, but she didn’t look away as she let her feet carry her to where he was.

Chat, of course, took the most ridiculous pose as he backed up, the other half of his staff in hand, crouching and then launching himself up with it and pulling off a full three spins midair.

Ladybug wolf-whistled and called out, “Go for four!”

Chat went for four, wobbling a little as he stuck his landing.

It was pretty damn impressive, Ladybug had to admit. Still, that didn’t stop her from daring him, “Bet you can’t do five.”

Chat shook himself like a ruffled cat, combing his bangs back with the expression of licking its paw. “Who do you think you’re talking to?”

“Oooooh.” Ladybug drew out the vowel. She was almost there. “Getting _cocky_ now are we, tiger?”

“Psh,” said Chat, and took his position.

He _completely_ flubbed the landing of that one, tripping over his tail and flailing at the edge of the roof and then tumbling ass-over-teakettle over the edge.

Ladybug’s heart leaped into her mouth, throbbing one, two, three times before Chat spoke.

“…Ow.”

_“Pffffffffffffft.”_

On her screen, the very tip of Chat’s tail flicked.

Ladybug touched down in the alley he was hanging over, dodging trash and puddles alike as she picked up his fallen weapon-turned-pole-vault. Closing her communicator screen, she searched the roof ledge for a fluffy blond head, and found Chat drooping over the ledge, comically downcast.

“Hey, Chat.”

Chat, still a lump growth on the overhang, flinched.

“…Hey, bugaboo.”

“You dropped something,” Ladybug informed him, badly suppressed amusement pressing against the inside of her ribcage. She wiggled his staff.

Chat raised his head, glancing between his staff and her twitching grin, and said, “…Oh.”

She twirled it in a little circle, questioning, and he deigned to present his hand, palm up.

Catching his eye, Ladybug gave into a quicksilver impulse and pressed the butt of his staff against her lips with an easy wink.

Chat _choked._

It was cool and smooth, damp enough that she wished she hadn’t, but the _look_ on Chat’s face was _priceless._

Sugar sweet, she purred, “See you Sunday, _tiger,_ ” and tossed it up into his hands. She waited just long enough to make sure he didn’t drop it again and then she tossed her yo-yo and reeled herself back up to her patrol route.

* * *

Once she was out of earshot, the window across the way opened, ungreased tracks scraping something fierce.

The opener, a civilian that Chat had probably saved at one point or another, beheld the place where Ladybug had disappeared from for a long moment, then offered, “Crushes suck.”

“…Yeah, they kinda do.”

“Want a cookie? My mom made, like, five batches.”

“…Yeah. Thanks.”

**Author's Note:**

> reminder to drink a glass of water today!


End file.
